Decay

“See this here? This is dry rot. This tree is ruined.”

The kids gathered around. “Ewwwww... that’s gross”. The boys were fascinated and started kicking at the fallen tree trunk.The underside, roots and dirt clumps were exposed as the once mighty tree laid on it’s side.   Chunks of wood eaten away by decay. If you looked closer you could see where the fungus had eaten away the insides. A white trail of a sponge like substance had found it’s way to the trunk’s inner core and starting eating away at it’s goodness. Obviously left unattended for years, with no recourse or treatment on getting better the tree collapses. There is no more goodness to keep it upright and standing. It’s foundation wrecked. 

The kids had scampered ahead. We were done with the botanical part of the zoo and now onto something more exciting ..the lions. 

I held back and let the kids run ahead without me. I took them to the Springfield Botanical Gardens and Zoo because I needed to get outside of my head. I needed a distraction. I needed the kids to not need me today. 

Last night was bad. Paul came home and the arguing started almost immediately. We argued about everything and about nothing at the same time. When our words took us nowhere we moved on to the silent treatment. Pretending that we just don’t care. I went to bed alone and tried to sleep. Sleep that was difficult because my brain and my heart were engaging in their own battle. A battle of shattered thoughts and broken dreams.  He slept on the couch and was gone when I woke up this morning. A routine that is now the norm.

I looked at the tree with a familiar sadness. Looking at the decayed, rotting tree I saw my marriage. Something once strong, towering upwards toward the sky has now crumpled down to the ground falling into ruin. A marriage left unattended for years and is now in ruin.


This post inspired by the folks at Trifecta. Be sure to stop by there and meet some awesome people!